Zack's Toxin
by MinaTakahashii
Summary: Today had to be the worst day of the week. Now why is this? Because it is the one day Zack is allowed to have soda. Once a week this happens and once a week he chooses the same soda. The liquid crack itself: Mountain Dew.


**I do not own Final Fantasy VII or anything else mentioned except for the plot.**

**Warning: Guy/Guy and major Zack OOC. Thou have been warned. **

**A/N: So… This is my first time with this pairing, but I love them so that should make up for it. I also pledged that the first fic I wrote for them would not be emo, so it isn't! It was going to be though, but then I got happier so now it's pointless fluff. Yay! So here you go, please review!**

**And I'm pretty sure that I actually can write Zack in character (which should happen in a later fic… -smile-) so don't nail me about how off it is now. It was meant to be this way, okay?**

Today had to be the worst day of the week. Now why is this? Because it is the one day Zack is allowed to have soda. Once a week this happens and once a week he chooses the same soda. The liquid crack itself: Mountain Dew.

And I, Cloud Strife, was the one who had to make sure he didn't blow anything up. Or other things that could be far worse…

I had started to think that he would get used to the caffeine content, but my hypothesis proved incorrect. His reaction to the drink was the same ever, single time.

With a sigh I pushed open the door to the room I shared with the first class SOLDIER and sat down on the bed with a plop.

"Who-ha! Who-ha! He's my best friend, best of all best friends, do you have a best friend too?!" I heard Zack sing from the bathroom. I noticed that the shower was on as well, so I knew it would take him at least another fifteen minutes to get out.

"Shut up Zack." I muttered, putting a pillow over my face. He really did have a horrid singing voice. I loved him and all, but there were some things that couldn't be denied.

"It tickles in my tummy; he's so yummy, yummy! You should get a best friend too!" The brunette continued to sing.

"You better be singing about me Fair." I mumbled to myself, throwing the pillow against the wall and giving up on sleep. I sat up slowly and rubbed my fingers through my hair. If I didn't have to be here right now life would be so much greater.

Zack continued to sing for the next ten minutes (slightly shorter than I anticipated) until I finally heard the shower cut off. I had to wait another few minutes before I heard the door open.

"Finally, what took- Gah! Haven't you ever heard of a towel!?" I asked, seeing a completely naked Zack right in front of me.

"Ah, what's wrong Cloudy?" He asked, walking over to where I was still seated on the bed. "We're both guys, right?" Chuckling slightly, he ruffled my hair.

"Yeah, _gay_ guys you idiot." I said, batting his hand away.

"Aw, I never noticed." Zack said, pressing a quick kiss to my lips.

"Then you're oblivious." I muttered. He just stood there for a minute, smirking slightly. "Just go get dressed!" I finally exclaimed, pushing him towards the dresser.

"Gosh. Cloudy's so pushy!" Zack said, stumbling slightly. I swear; it's as if he's drunk when he has caffeine.

"Never, _ever_ let anyone give you coffee." I said, shaking my head that was already starting to ache. It was going to be a long, long day.

---

"Wee-woo."

"Zack, shut up."

"Cloudy! You have to guess what I am!"

"A fire truck. Now shove it."

"Aw, you got it. Now let's try something else!"

Must not punch him. Must not punch him. "Let's not." I said, rubbing my temples. I looked over my shoulder at the clock and saw that it was only three. Can time go any slower?!

"Please Cloudy? For me?" Zack said, crawling into my lap and looking up through his eyelashes with large, blue eyes. God. This was the same way he got me into this idiotic game.

"Are you sure you're the older one?" I muttered.

"Clou-"

"Call me Cloudy again and there is no way I'll play." I warned, glared for the extra effect.

"B-but, Spikey!" Zack exclaimed, wrapping his arms around my neck and managing to pin me to the ground in the process. "It's fun to play!"

"In your opinion." I muttered, pushing myself, and a rather disappointed looking Zack, back up. He looked at me with the most pitiful look I have ever seen on his face and sighed. "Moo." I muttered.

"Oh! You're a cow!" Zack said snapping his fingers.

_No. Of course I'm not a cow. I'm a fucking duck._ I thought. "Yes." I said.

"Do I get a reward for being right?" He asked hopefully.

I cocked an eyebrow. This was new. Wasn't it? I scanned my memory for anything like this in the previous weeks and when I couldn't remember anything I shrugged and gave the worst possible answer: "Maybe."

"That isn't an answer!" Zack said, hitting me on the head lightly. I rubbed the spot that he had hit, making it look like it had hurt. "Cloud, you okay?" He asked, moving my hand aside to rub the area himself. Finally! The overprotective Zack I loved. And there were no more pet names. That was always a plus.

I smirked to myself in slight triumph and made a mental note that being hurt brings Zack out of his highness for at least a little while. But I was still hoping that the caffeine was out of his system…

"Yeah, I'm fine." I said, looking down at him. He was perched right in front of my knees: The perfect position for cuddling… Of course I had to be the one to think that. The things that go through Zack's brain are far different.

"Good. Now learn to take care of yourself, okay?" I glared at Zack, no longer afraid of sending him into a tantrum over some measly comment like a five year old.

"But that would provide far less entertainment for you." I said, almost growling.

"Aw, come on Cloud, don't be so temperamental!" The brunette said, ruffling my hair before removing his hand from my scalp. I shook my head to get rid of the feeling like there was something still in my hair. Well, the feeling went away, but a wrapper emerged.

"Zack!" I complained, picking the wrapper up off the ground. I crumpled it up and threw it at him, the small ball hitting him right in the middle of his forehead. Ha, that's what you get bipolar idiot.

"Truce!" Zack called, putting his hands in the air.

"Truce." I agreed. What had I done though? I threw a piece of paper at him. He put me through hell how many times over?

"Good." He said. Then I felt a pillow hit me in the stomach. Was a pillow supposed to feel that damn hard? I toppled over some from the surprise (he didn't throw it _that_ hard) and glared at my ass of a boyfriend.

"What type of truce is that?" I asked harshly.

"It isn't. I'm declaring a new war." Zack said. "Now throw the pillow back so I can throw it at you again."

"That's a great way to make me agree." I said, rolling my eyes. I grabbed the pillow regardless and chucked it at him as hard as I could. Turns out when I aim however, that I am very off. I tried to hit him right in the middle of his pretty face, and well, let's say that it ended up much farther south.

"Strife! I need that!" He said loudly, doubling over.

I shrugged. "Not that much." Was I supposed to feel sorry for him or something?

"That isn't much of an apology." He said through gritted teeth.

"Good, because I wasn't planning on apologizing. It works out." I said, standing up. I brushed off the back of my pants and looked behind me. We really should think about cleaning this place sometime…

I walked over to one of the chairs and sat down on it backwards so that my head could rest on the back. I flipped the television on and flipped through a couple of channels before deciding that there wasn't anything good on. With a disappointed sigh, I turned it off.

"Cruel." Zack muttered. He must have been rather close for his breath to flow that easily down the back of my neck. I felt a nip at my ear and smiled lightly.

"You must have forgiven me then." I said cockily, standing up.

"Where are you going?!" Zack asked, following me. He must have had other plans on what to do with me after that little love bite.

"To the cafeteria. I'm going to give you a taste of the hell you give me." I said, checking my pockets to make sure I had a key to get back into the room.

"That doesn't sound all that loving." Zack said, pouting.

I let out an aggravated breath before turning around and staring Zack in the eye. He could be so… difficult sometimes. "You know I love you." I said, pressing my lips to his in an all-too-short kiss. But alas, I had places to be.

"Wait! Cloudy!" Zack said, grabbing my arm. He opened his mouth to continue but I cut him off.

"And that just made your case worse." I said, patting his shoulder sympathetically.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" He asked, tired of trying to guess what I was talking about.

"I'm going to give Mountain Dew a try. And the amount I drink goes up every time you call me 'Cloudy'." I said, grabbing a five dollar bill from my wallet on the bedside table.

"That isn't so bad." Zack said, letting go of my arm and scratching the back of his head, giving me one of his clueless smiles.

I chuckled lightly. "Yes, but what you don't know is that I haven't had caffeine in several _years_ Zacky." I said, the overly confident smile never leaving my face all the way down to the cafeteria. I think Zack is still in the room, trying to figure out exactly how bad this will be.

**A/N: So there you go! I don't like it that much, but if you, my dear, dear readers, do then it all works out! So poor Zack has no idea what he's getting into… -evil smile- So if you want a sequel (with a rather high Cloud of course!) than let me know in the form of a lovely review! **

**Buh-bye for now folks!**


End file.
